Longest Poem Ever!

• Polly, a "Published Poet" (as opposed to being a mere scribbler of couplets) is currently at work on several epic poems.
• Determined to break the record for "Longest Poem Ever", she has already written 420 pages of an important poem called "The Day of My Toothache".
• Previously, Polly published a pamphlet, containing the ode, "Don't Wear My Bra"
• When asked how she decides on the topic of a poem, Polly replied, "I don't choose the topic. The topic chooses me." (she was quite snippy, actually)

Caught!

 

What is it? - a hair-tease
Where is it? - at a daycare
Here I am, caught off-guard, giving my hair a much needed tease!! When challenged about my priorities, I simply said, "Babies cry all the time. Just because they need something doesn't mean I should neglect looking good. The visuals during a bottle feed are tres importante!! "
(When I feel passionate about something, I often slip into French language. I can't help it. It's just something I do!!)

Polly Post

Polly, pining!
 

       While her husband Peter languishes in jail, Polly (a published poet) pines! When asked how she endures the enforced separation, Polly admits to uncontrollable sobbing in public places.

     She noted that the library was not a very sympathetic place to pine as "the kleenex was in short supply and there was a lot of shushing going on!" Supermarkets are no better, Polly says. "The freezer aisle was crowded and cold. The dairy aisle felt harsh and uncaring. Only around the fruits and vegetables was there any hint of humanity."

        Perhaps there is some truth to the old saying that "It takes a vegetarian to really understand deep suffering!" 

This Reporter

Who's Humming Now?!

After touring the lower, southwest corner of North Dakota for 14 long years, Ruthann Hummer is proud to announce the release of her new CD, "Humming with the Best of Them". Each song features a popular artist with Ruthann's harmonious humming dubbed over their vocals.
Hear Lady Gaga's "Born this Way" hummed to perfection. Reel with delight as Ruthann interprets Metallica's "Enter Sandman" with exquisite timing. And finally, her rendition of "Born to Run" by Bruce Springsteen is unparalled! What a long time coming!!

Intellectual Pursuits



Excuse me, I'm reading!

Unlike most of the generous populace, I have always been a vivacious reader. I suppose that's how I stay so very, very up-to-date!!  Instead of pvr'ing "Nancy Grace" or "Oprah", I spend my commercial time flicking through magazines. Yes, I do tend to get very, very sleepy, but that's nothing a short nap won't cure!

over and out,

Roxanne

New Year's Eve

"Pretty loves to Party!"

On New Year's Eve, Pretty Girl was partying at a furious rate. After three glasses of bubbly, she began to shout out, "Pretty loves to Party!" Many of the clientel at this un-named location were in a more solemn mood, so Pretty Girl was given a stern look by the bartender. Too drunk to care, PeeGee-Lo ordered another sparkling beverage and a shot of Tequila. Thus began her marathon kereoke session. Completely without a mike, she climbed up onto the bar and belted out "Wind Beneath My Wings". Reports of clothes coming off have been unsubstantiated.

This Reporter

Ask the Doctor

"Dr. Didi looking thoughtful"

Many people are confused about proper child-rearing techniques.
"Are we supposed to be their friends or foes?" they query.
"Do we make them do what we think is right, or
do we shuffle things around according to their feelings?"

These are good questions.

I can only answer based on the complete authority of

my Ph.D, my Years of Experience, and how I, myself,  was raised!

 Fly by the seat of your pants!

Go with the flow of your moods. 

If you're nasty 'cause you're stressed, or silly cause you've had one glass of wine too many,
be not afraid dear parents, nor overly concerned.
You're actually giving children a glimpse of the real world instead of some

fantasy la la land where they are loved and taken care of!